We as men struggle with making changes in our lives. Shoot many people struggle with making significant changes in their life. we talk about them and talk about them and many times that is all that happens. We do just a bit of busy work and nothing results. Why do we struggle so much to reach our aspirations? There are many different reasons behind what is holding us back but the biggest culprit is our own minds.
Our brains are very adept at convincing us that we are in mortal danger if we try something new. It’s not Pleasurable, it is often painful and takes a lot of energy so it goes against all of our motivational triad. So our mind works twice as hard to try to get us to stay safe and sound. instead of going out and doing something that might ostracize us.
What holds us back
So how does our mind like to work so that we don’t do what will make us better? There are many different tactics and strategies it will use, but there are 4 pretty common aspects that our beautiful mind will do so we don’t try to get ourselves killed.
Fear of…
As mentioned in Dune, Fear is the mind-killer. This is because we will often stop thinking when we are afraid. Is there really anything to be afraid of when you are talking to your wife? No, she may get mad and even throw a fit but that isn’t overly dangerous. Except for the extreme instances of a certifiable unhinged woman, most women will not try to kill you just because you asked her a question. With everything when we are afraid and let fear be entertained we will find ourselves struggling over the most minuscule obstacle.
Failing
We often find ourselves afraid of failing. Yet we also say failing is learning. Is learning dangerous? To our mind it is. Failing is going to cause us to be thrown out of the village and we will not be able to eat or have shelter. We won’t get a mate, nor will we have protection. we will be exposed and therefore we will die in some horrible way.
Being rejected
Being told no is scary. No matter if it is a total stranger or our beloved wife. No is a hard rejection for us men. This is because being told no means that we aren’t good enough to warrant a yes.
Not being understood
We speak the same language but still we struggle with being understood. We are afraid that people will mistake what we are saying completely wrong and this will lead to a no or again a failure.
Success
Money changes you
Being uncomfortable
Who wants that?
Indulgent emotions
- Confusion
- Worry
- Mental Spin
Past thinking
I never did anything like that before.
Self-Doubt
I dont think i can do that
How do we take action?
By taking action
