In this episode, we celebrate the 200th episode of the podcast/show. Initially, the host had planned on offering live coaching sessions but unfortunately, no one signed up. This leads the host to reflect on what this lack of sign-ups means and how he can self-coach himself through this situation.
He recognizes that berating himself or blaming others won’t solve the problem and instead focuses on shifting his thoughts and approaching the situation with intentionality. Throughout the episode, the host shares his disappointment but also emphasizes the importance of learning from setbacks.
The host ponders why no one signed up for the coaching and expresses a desire to improve and overcome such challenges in the future. The host starts by reflecting on why he hasn’t been able to capture people’s attention and mentions that he is currently listening to Robert Cialdini’s book “Influence” to learn about ethical influence. He admits feeling disappointed and acknowledges that he let himself down by not learning the necessary lessons to attract people. Despite this setback, he remains determined to offer live coaching sessions in the future, approximately every 10 episodes.
To process his feelings of being let down, the host decides to do a thought download. He explores the circumstance of nobody signing up for coaching and acknowledges that this thought might mean he needs to improve his communication skills or that he may not be a good coach. He also realizes the need to improve his advertising on Facebook and start promoting earlier to generate more trust from potential clients. The host understands the importance of learning from mistakes and generating more thoughts to gain a better understanding of his emotions.
The host then moves on to using a model to process his thoughts and emotions. He explains the model and how it can be applied to any circumstance. The circumstance he chooses is that nobody showed up for coaching. The next step is to choose one thought to focus on, such as “I am not a good marketer,” and examine the feeling that thought generates. The host introduces an app called “How We Feel” that helps break down emotions into four quadrants. The host realizes that the emotion that resonates with him the most is frustration. He discusses how frustration can lead to negative actions, such as wanting to quit or engaging in negative self-talk. The host emphasizes that engaging in negative self-talk or quitting won’t lead to success in his business. He acknowledges that the problem lies in his thoughts and beliefs and the need to change them to gain control over his emotions and direction in life. He encourages embracing emotions, sitting with them, and fully experiencing them instead of avoiding them.
Through exploring his frustration, the host describes how it feels in his body and acknowledges that emotions only last for a short time. He stresses the importance of questioning the truth and usefulness of thoughts and choosing better ones. For example, reframing the thought “I’m not a good marketer” as “I am an inexperienced marketer” and focusing on learning and growth. The host shares his desire to become a successful marketer and mentions a podcast by Ray Edwards that he highly recommends. He expresses his resolve to take action and start coaching others, using this podcast as a way to coach listeners. While no one has signed up for coaching yet, the host believes it will happen and he will become a great marketer through practice and learning. He discusses the importance of selling ideas and effective communication, particularly in relationships, and reflects on his experiences in coaching both men and women.
The host also mentions the importance of finding the balance between promoting and overwhelming the audience and acknowledges the need for improvement in his marketing strategies. The host concludes the episode by expressing gratitude to the listeners for tuning in to the special 200th episode. He encourages them to leave comments on the website and share their thoughts. He emphasizes that his purpose is to help listeners overcome challenges and improve themselves as men. The host reminds listeners to take intentional steps towards having better relationships and offers his coaching services in the future. He reassures listeners that even as a coach, he still has emotional reactions but chooses not to respond to them. He believes that true freedom and joy can be found through intentional thoughts and navigating life‘s highs and lows.
The episode concludes with the host expressing his gratitude once again and his hope to see listeners in 10 weeks for more coaching.
The Model
C – CIrcumstance
T – Thought of the Circumstance
F – The Feeling created by that thought
A – The Action you perform because you are feeling that emotion
R – The Result you have because of that action
00:00:00 Celebrating Episode 200 – Reflecting on Progress
00:01:10 Live Coaching Failure: No Sign-ups
00:03:34 Learning from Setbacks and Striving for Improvement
00:12:40 Understanding the Connection between Thoughts and Emotions
00:15:55 Exploring the Disappointment of not being a good marketer
00:19:21 Understanding Emotions: High Energy, Positive/Negative, Low Energy, Positive/Negative
00:28:03 Developing a Relationship and Dealing with Jealousy
00:33:14 Allowing Emotions to Pass and Shifting Mindset
00:37:36 Embracing Growth and Evolution
00:40:13 Relationship Coaching and the Nuances of Communication
00:48:01 Making Little Steps to Improve Your Relationship
