The Truth of Your Circumstances

There are parts of life that we struggle with from time to time. We see something happen and the thoughts come pouring in. Something may happen to us and again we start to think and from this, we have positive or negative emotions. We crave the positive and run from the negative. We want to be happy all the time and be sad only when it is appropriate for us to cry. We find ways to bargain out our rough times while we deflect the compliments meant for us.

We are odd strange beings running around the earth. We want to believe all of our emotions are a product of our environment. This is why people divorce because they think they aren’t being made happy. These poor souls want to have their happiness be somebody else’s responsibility. That is why they get so angry when that person tasked with the joy button doesn’t press it enough. They are supposed to make the other person happy and yet why are they not happy? The unhappy person thinks that the other person is not upholding their responsibility. They are to make the other person happy! So why are they not doing their job?

The 50/50 principle

A big thing to know about life and other people is that you have half of your life is going to be Joy and the other half is going to be Suffering. This is called the 50/50 principle. Half of your life is going to be positive, and it will be full of love, pride, joy, laughter, connection, and all other feel-good emotions. Then you are also going to have the other half of your life and it is going to be full of misery, pain, suffering, hate, and other negative emotions.

Now those swings from positive to negative and back are going to happen day to day hour by hour and sometimes minute by minute. It is all based on an important element in your world. Your thoughts. How you think of a circumstance is going to make you feel good or bad. This is also why one minute you are laughing like a loon and then the next you are crying in your post toasties. The root of your emotions isn’t the circumstance at all. It is your thoughts. So what is the deal about your circumstance?

what are your circumstances?

Circumstances are the little bits of facts in your life. Your wife complaining to you isn’t the circumstance. Your wife talking to you in a loud voice isn’t a circumstance. Yeah, it’s a fact! No, it’s not a fact. It is a thought. The circumstance is based on facts. Nothing but facts. You may want to say Whe was yelling. You think she is yelling while she may think she is talking very passionately. My wife and I have this discussion all the time. She wants to say Im raising my voice and I say I am just amping up my passion. The real circumstance is you and your wife were talking about money.

You see a fact is something you can go to a court and say this is an “A” and everyone in that courtroom would say, Yep, that is for sure an “A”. You can say it is a blue A because someone may say that it is a Blue-green A. So Your circumstance is just the fact without any thoughts mingled in. It is easy to try to mix thoughts into the circumstance because we are thinking beings but the truth of the matter is that circumstances are thought-free facts.

Circumstances are neutral

Now this is a challenge for many people especially people who live their life in Emotional Childhood. That is because they firmly believe that their circumstance actually created their emotions. They fight for the belief that emotions just run around all willy-nilly and when “pissed off” runs into you. You have no choice but to be angry.

To show that isn’t the case look at the last time you had a loved one pass away. You were sad, right? When did you become sad? It wasn’t at the moment of their death. You may have been having a great day until you got that phone call. You didn’t become sad until you were told. Then you had a thought that made you sad.

That means that you were not happy nor were you sad because of the circumstance. Your thought made you happy or sad.

Another example is when you and a good friend go and watch a movie together and you both come out with completely different experiences. Why did you like it and he hate it? Because of your thoughts. Yall saw the same movie at the same time. The movie wasn’t good nor was it bad. You had a thought about he movie that brought on the feelings of a good movie or a bad movie.

What does that even mean?

This is because all circumstances are neutral until you apply a thought to them. That’s why your wife isn’t yelling nor is she talking passionately to you she is just talking. You interpret that tone and speed at which she is talking to mean one thing and she is taking it to mean something else. That is why you think your boss hates you when he doesn’t talk to you. Those feelings of rejection or whatever are just the results of your thoughts.

So being robbed can be a good thing?

So since everything is neutral as I say then that must mean you getting robbed can actually be a good thing? I have seen people who have been robbed and it doesn’t bother them. Yet that is a reality. I am not saying you have to be happy all the time. There are times when it is good to have other emotions than the giggles. Like when you are at your grandmother’s funeral you don’t want to be laughing through the service. There are times when it is good to have a “negative” Emotion. Then there are times when it is good to have positive emotions. Those times are up to you.

I am getting at that many people want to bemoan to the point that they don’t have more happy times than they want. That type of person forgets that they have to have negative emotions to appreciate the positive. So to have a great life, you have to go through the swamps of sadness.

If you are struggling to make it past the emotions don’t happen to you schedule a call and let’s see what is holding you back