There are times when men need to have special time Now, go ahead and snicker. It does sound like I am talking about men’s particular alone time with their women. I am not talking about that. I am talking about Men needing to allocate time for themselves and why it is vital for a man to do this so they can stay balanced and healthy.
We all know those men who never take time for themselves. They are always answering the call of friends or bosses or spouses. These men are going 8 ways all at the same time and then sometime down the road, we see them crash. It may be in some way they are numbing their life with alcohol, and drugs or they just burn out.
Many men have bought into the story that the only way you can be valuable is by doing things for other people. While this can appear to be true it isn’t the whole story. Yes, you do create value by working. You also create value when you value yourself. That is where your value starts, Is when you value yourself. You can’t just ignore your core being and think you can carry on without doing damage to yourself.
Time with other men
Now I will touch on this again at the end as we are talking about the 4 pillars of a relaxed male, however time with other men is particularly important for men. We need to refresh our masculine energy to be able to do any other the rest of our callings.
The way we refresh is by meeting and hanging out with other masculine men. When I say hanging out it can men doing nothing but talking yet many times when the word hanging out is used, men are referring to the act of doing something around other men. That may be camping or it may be working shoulder to shoulder working on a project.
The time spent with other men removes the negative emotions a man has been baring and allows the other men to process that emotion and energy so that it can be converted into positive energy. So that the men in that group can leave and go to their families and be the rock their family needs.
Time to think
Men also need time away from their friends and family so that they are able to think and process the day. This is often at the end of a day but it can also be at the beginning. In fact, it can be at the beginning and at the end of the day. Encapsulate the day with the intention of planning and reviewing your day.
Thinking and processing what you are doing or going to do allows men to take one hat off and put on the family man hat. If we do not take time to process the day then we never leave the office. We will slowly process the day through the evening. This can come across as we are being distant.
This time goes for those periods that are not feeding our souls. We can often be obsessed with our passion and rightfully so. That act is what makes us whole and balanced. So yeah there will be times that we are preoccupied with something that we love to do and that is something different than going over all of the stuff that was a resistance and a grind. Process those and leave them at the door when possible.
Feeding His Soul
A man’s soul is where his passion is. This is another one of the 4 pillars of a Relaxed Male and it is what makes a man interesting. A man who is driven attracts people to him. There are people who want to help. There are people who are attracted to his energy of action. The fact that he is moving forward is attractive to those around him. If you want your ex-wife to notice you, get to doing what you are passionate about. Do you want to attract a new woman? Feed your soul. You will have men and women finding you.
He is planning
Part of feeding a man’s soul and giving him time to think is that a man needs time to plan. Yeah, it is thinking but to allow a man to dream incorporates not only his thinking but also his need to plan his dreams out.
What are you going to do not just tomorrow but what are you going to do, Next week? For the rest of the year? How about 5 years down the road? You don’t know? Why?
Working on the 4 pillars
There are 4 pillars to being a relaxed male. There is the Man’s Mind which takes time to read. Men do need to read some type of nonfiction, and reading at least 10 pages a day is getting men further down their path than just thinking of doing it.
Men also need time to work on their bodies. The Man’s Body can be anything from a 15-minute walk to a 3-hour workout. Men moving their bodies and strengthening themselves is needed for men to be healthy and in shape to protect their families. That type of work takes time.
I mentioned the man’s soul pillar a little earlier. That passion a man has creates a spark that is visible to people who are seeing his value. Men have a purpose and it is often their purpose to find that purpose if they don’t know what it is. That purpose isn’t viewed as work to them. It is something that they just have to do to complete themselves.
Finally, there is the man’s community and that is men being around other men. Yeah, it may be a weekly poker night and that may seem like a waste of time to their spouse. But to the man it is important. If they want to get things done in their life they need to be playing poker with people who are pushing them to greatness.
As you can see all of these are important and needed in a man’s life. It is imperative that men have time to work on themselves. Without time for men to do what’s needed they are going to be led to burnout and depression. Nothing worse than losing a man because he sacrificed the needs of others above his own.
